Knowing Your Limits: Boundaries in Relationships

Boundaries are used when people want to set healthy limits for their personal space and possibly their surrounding space. Boundaries can be both physically and emotional. These boundaries just depend on the person and how they are used in the relationship with the next.
Boundaries help people recognize the desires and needs that they may want from the other person in the relationship. Learning proper boundaries helps each person get an understanding and clarity of each other. It is also a way for each person to not feel that they will be manipulated, violated, or mistreated.

Talking About Boundaries

When discussing boundaries in a relationship it is best that each person is heard and respected. If each person is not able to speak this could create weak boundaries. Each person must be able to speak on their own feelings as well as adhere to the other person’s requests. This is a start to open communication in which each person can speak freely on their thoughts and what should happen.
It is also helpful to talk about what is acceptable and what is not. Giving examples when explaining acceptable is helpful also; this will allow the other person clarification and a greater picture of what is expected. Knowing what is acceptable will also eliminate the chances of assumptions. If one must assume then it might be a sign that weak boundaries were set, and both parties should revisit the agreement.

Using Resources to Set Boundaries

Sometimes people find it hard to set boundaries. It could be because of a person’s past or they could feel that they may not get the respect that they desire. Also, setting boundaries does not always happen easily. It’s often a skill that one person, or both, need to learn from a professional.
Boundaries are in no mean to be confused with ultimatums or demands. Boundaries are only limits that are set between two people that agree with the boundaries. Setting boundaries are a part of any healthy relationship. By creating boundaries, you have a benchmark to assess when someone may be overstepping your limits.